The demented and the dementia-1000 miles from home
I’ve
missed writing-I’ve missed my novel-but as ever life gets in the way, or rather
in this case another aspect of life…
Returning
to the ‘homeland’ for a brief spell to help take care of my grandmother has
awakened me to the tragedy that is to watch a loved one slowly but surely ‘lose
their mind’-a term that we all use occasionally in a somewhat frivolous manner
but the stark reality is something truly disturbing to witness. It can of
course happen at any other point in life in other ways due to all manner of
factors but in the form of ‘Dementia’ it is without doubt quite horrendous, for
many our eventual greatest fear: Is it though in reality far worse for those on
the outside, observing this gradual deterioration? That is, losing our concept
of what we perceive as sanity?
Does our own fear and emotional attachment
colour our objectivity? ‘Fear’ is a term that has appeared consistently-a
highly complex emotion, at times completely irrational and in other moments, an
understandable response and yet; how much does fear determine our decision in
making the ‘right choice’? This is of course far harder when it concerns
someone else’s wellbeing- a person we no longer deem capable of making a
rational decision for them-self: No decision will ever truly be the right one.
I
don’t know what the outcome will be in this particular case but what I do know
is that it has forced me into confronting my own personal fears as well as my
complex views on family structure, society’s attitudes and how we treat our
elderly in the West. Despite the dark nature of many of my thoughts and
experiences there is always a light side-as my great grandmother once said-it
is possessing a good sense of humour that gets you through life and believe me,
humour is what has got me through some of these last few days and not only my
own humour: It is a joyful moment when the stubborn spirit of that fading
personality suddenly shines through and reminds you who that person truly is
beyond that frail outer shell; ‘a tough old bird’ and an ironic one at that.
Strange
how here, amongst the urban madness that is London, I momentarily feel ‘a
thousand miles from nowhere’ a metaphor for many complex emotions methinks…
2 Comments
Geez, I can't put you down! Keep it up love!
ReplyDeleteBarry
Thanks very much-it's a great feeling to know that people enjoy what you do! Have recently started another novel and a few more articles...watch this space :)
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